This is what I get for trying to be "social"...

So it seems I'm currently in a "Gay Bar" phase, thanks to Kam who twice in a week has invited me out with her to gay bars. (Is she trying to tell us something? Jk... we were out meeting some of her friends from Mary Wash.) The first incident was a surprise to me as I suddenly found myself standing beneath a large awning and a big rainbow flag. When Kam called me and asked me to go out, I was reluctant as usual, being the homebody that I am, but then I convinced myself that I had to be more social, and hey, maybe I'll even meet somebody. After all, one cannot meet a future husband if one is at home on couch. So upon discovering we'd be spending the evening at a gay establishment, I said some expletives to myself as I realized tonight wasn't going to be that night of love at first sight (at least not mutual). If I was going to meet my future husband (ok, let's settle for future boyfriend for now, how bout that), it was not going to be here.

But I did know that the night could still be a ton of fun and good story telling at the least. I was definitely right. Among other things, there were the shirtless bartender sightings on the dancefloor level of the bar and nice chats with some random friendly guys about their Oscar parties. The highlight of the evening, however, was when a friend of Kam's was talking to some guy who turned to me and said, "Oh, you're single? My brother's here, he's straight, we should introduce you!!" This could be interesting and/or funny, I thought to myself... let's see what happens. Onward we go, through the crowded bar until suddenly we run into this guy's brother, and we're all standing around in an awkward circle, shaking hands, exchanging names. Then, quickly, almost in a whisper, the guy turns to me and says "Oh there's just one thing! My brother doesn't speak English." From here, the whole situation kind of slowed down in my mind and became kind of like a dream sequence (you know, when nothing really makes sense and new characters arrive out of nowhere and the next thing you know you're in a completely different place). All I know is that Kam, buzzed off her 3/4 of a beer, comes up with "I don't like the white car" (apparently the one line of Spanish she knows), and I'm just blank. I don't even remember what happens next except that we acknowledge that the guy was actually pretty good looking (not sure if it was the vodka talking though) and it could be hilarious to try and have a "Love Actually" Colin Firth moment with him. Well, that never happened, because like I said, weird dream sequence, and suddenly we were back where we started and I have no idea what happened to the Spanish guy. Such is my luck, I suppose. The one straight guy in the establishment and he doesn't speak a lick of English! Whoo!

So I guess it should come as some surprise that after that night I would consider going back to a gay bar, let alone less than a week later (!). Last night, I was forewarned about the venue but was enticed by the prospect of playing Family Feud hosted by a drag queen. What I didn't actually understand was that we would actually be on stage, like, as the entertainment for the bar. I thought it'd just be good ol' trivia style that involved everyone at their booths and tables, but noo, it was actually real game show style, and we'd been pre-registered as one of this week's teams.

In a strange turn of events, Kam's gay friend who was supposed to be out with us backed out last minute, leaving 4 straight girls on a Family Feud team named "The Asians." Luckily, this bar was slightly less crowded than the previous one, and it seemed to be just a few regulars hanging around, and we didn't have to worry about being laughed off the stage or anything. Once I settled into my free drink, I was actually excited about playing the Feud!! After all, isn't it everyone's dream to actually participate in one of the best game shows ever? The sad part was "The Asians" were terrible and we were embarassed by our opponents. That also meant I didn't get a chance to play the speed round, one of my favorite parts of the game. It was still a great time, though, and probably the closest I'll get to real game show fame, unless I decide to go out to Cali again to play the Price is Right before Bob Barker turns 150 years old.

Let me ask you this, though. If you were to name a character from "Sesame Street" and you were up at the podium playing the Feud, who would you pick? (That is, which character would you expect to be the #1 answer?) I said Big Bird and I thought we would own the board. BAAAAA (wrong!!), Big Bird was the #5 answer! Robbery!! (Oscar was #1) I'm not sure who was polled in this survey but I guess it made sense after hearing some of the previous questions. "Monkey" and "Tarzan" appeared as the top answers to the question "Name something that you see in a tree," while "Cat" did not (Cat was Kam's answer, which was a bad face-off answer, but still a somewhat sensible choice).

Anyway, that's my gay bar update. Although Lavenia, the beautiful drag queen host, insisted we come back to play the Feud again, I'm not sure that I should begin to become a regular just yet. I've already told Kam and her friends that the next time we go out it will have to be at a place where the good looking men we see are actually potentially interested. I didn't mind not waiting in line for the ladies' room, though...


Current Music: Across the Universe, by Rufus Wainwright
Current Mood: tired, weird